February Happiness Project

I decided that February my focus would be on relationships and my own personal commandments. I was going to force myself to sit down and write my commandments (which I have done and will share at a later day). Then, I would start some research on some of my more nagging relationship issues. The premise of the happiness project is that you cannot change someone else, you must only work on yourself.  I decided that I would act "as if"... I am going to act as if my relationship is absolutely perfect. The response was amazing.  I heard "I feel like we are doing so good and I am so happy" from my partner.  I guess one person becoming happy really does impact the other person.

The other thing I decided to do was to stop looking at the facebook page of someone who has been hurting me. I don't think it is intentional on this person's part, and it isn't even really directed at me, it's just a lack of consideration for my feelings that has got me upset.  This reminded me of a book I once read called "The Four Agreements." In the Four Agreements, one of the cornerstones is to not take anything personally. Things that people do towards you are not about you (good or bad), it's about them. 

I decided that this would be one of my own personal commandments.  I am going to live with as much integrity and love as I can and then if people hurt me or are disrespectful then it is about them and not about me. 

'til next time, live a bella life,

jadi

My Personal Commandments

This is my picture.  It's who I am working on. It's not that I am unhappy. I just think that I am not realizing my full authentic life.  Therefore, I am writing my personal commandments.  I am going to say that for now, this list of commandments is a work in progress.

* Be Jadi
 Jadi loves music and needs some alone time with music to rejuvenate her soul.  I am a teacher.  As frustrating and exhausting as that job is, for now it is who I am- even though it doesn't pay enough-it makes me happy.

* Enjoy your home
Declutter, organize, clean and make shrines

* Enjoy your body
Eat good food, Exercise, and buy clothes that fit.

* Don't take things personally.
I am going to live my life with integrity and then I can know that if I acted with dignity and kindness then the way that other people behave is a statement about them not me.  If it does happen to "be me" that did something wrong, I will apologize-sincerely.

* Trust
Have faith that my partner will stay. Have faith that my partner is closest to me, and believe the positive evaluations of the other person.  I am going to act "as if" I already trust. Honestly this is not my partner's fault-I was given this pattern as a small child and I am working on it. Which brings me to my next commandment

*change
Life is about change.  I need to make sure that I give life the intention of positive direction.

* Compassion for me
I am going to forgive my mistakes, excuse my negative thoughts, ask those thoughts to leave, and quit negative self-talk.

If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion.

-Dali Lama

Relationship Happiness

I am continuing to work on my January happiness project-making my house more comfortable and organized-but, I am also beginning February's project which is doing things (not expecting things from others) that make me happier in my relationship.

First, I am doing 20 second hugs. Daily.  I read an article that after 20 seconds of a hug, a dose of oxytocin is released in the brain.  That makes me happier.

So far, this part of my project is well-received.  The response from my partner was: "why do we have to limit it to 20 seconds?"

We have always done warm hellos and goodbyes.  I am still thinking about some more things to add to my relationship portion of my project.

Here is a link for an article about 20 second hugs:

http://www.tydknow.com/did-you-know-that-a-hug-that-lasts-for-20-seconds-releases-oxytocin-which-can-make/

I Threw Out My Towels...

I took all my towels and threw them out... In the garage. Every last one of them is now in a new home. These towels are for washing cars, dogs, cleaning, beach/swim. They are no longer housed in my house.

I have given each person one lovely bath sheet from Ikea and I am getting them embroidered with initials so we all know which towel belongs to which person.

Why?  This is lunacy... Mad.... Craziness...

My theory is that we should have a clean set of towels for quests.  Then, we should each have a towel. Although, I might go get regular towels to match for drying hair. But, having an abundance of towels has simply meant having an abundance of laundry and towels are heavy. My laundry is in the basement, my showers are on the second story.  See... I am so smart.  They don't give Ph.D.'s to everyone, as you know....

Happiness Project

First, I should give a shout out to Gretchen Rubin. She wrote two books that have inspired my Happiness Project: The Happiness Project and Happier at Home. I am putting ideas together from both of the books to create my own happiness project.

Here are some of today's happiness project acts:

This is our downstairs bathroom.  It is more of a powder room, but it is where my partner gets ready for the day.  Yes, I am spoiled and get the Master Bath. But, I organized all of the things that we keep in there and I think I like that there  is some space to "grow" should we need to do so.

On the left is my organized projects.  I need to finish some keepsake books, photo albums, and I am making something with these ticket stubs.  My other happiness generator is music and I have a plethora of music stubs. On the right is my supplies for those projects.  I need one more of those bins I think. My craft desk is clear enough to work at now :)

Then I started to tackle the kid's room and bathroom.  This is her storage area in her bathroom.

 After we went through all of her things, she has room to spare.  I like to have some empty spaces.

The Elfa system from the Container Store was a major pain to start, but once we got it in there my 12 year old daughter was able to put the baskets in herself. She will be happy that her board is in the shot :) .
And, Lastly...

Hello Kitty!  This is the princess Mona.